Fitting In vs. Fitting Out

It's common knowledge that being in the company of others is a valuable experience. Something to treasure, memorize, replicate, and enjoy. Family members, co-workers, classmates, and childhood friends all share a collective desire to bond and build stronger connections with each passing day. Some with the ultimate goal to "grow old together" and hopefully celebrate each others successes. Aware that there will likely be frustrations, life-altering events, unseen occurrences that result in heartbreak and disappointment that will test the DNA of each relationship-- most seem to find a way to make room for the good and bad that comes with these connections. Simply put, they do it for the love. Unfortunately, there are many who struggle to find people whom they can relate to long enough to establish such an important life asset.

If having friends or belonging to a certain group/organization is fitting in, then being lonely (not to be confused with being single) is fitting out.

Even as a child, fitting in isn't "all it's cracked up to be" and in some cases, can be a traumatizing experience. The process doesn't get any easier as an adult. Does everyone eventually find someone else or a group of someone elses' to grow and change with? What of the ones that don't and have no such no luck of ever feeling like they "fit" in? Is there really a fence to straddle in that regard?

How about the "no friendless person left out or behind" act? Communication plays one of the biggest roles in this "conundrum" and there's no doubt that technology has changed how groups are formed.

But....

Tales from Retail Eyeglass Shopping

This was written back in March, but I felt it was a good idea to warn you all of the dangers of leaving the well-being of your eyeballs in the hands of mall employees.

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Because I have been having migraines and the fact that my eyeglass prescription is over two years old, I decided to stop by LensCrafters the other day. I’m an instant gratification type of gal, so the “ready in an hour” sales pitch appealed to me. My appointment was at 5:20 and I arrived a little early. Appointments never start on time so I wandered around browsing the selection in search of my new frames. There were only two cases to look through, and it was at least 20 minutes before I was seen, so I probably walked back and forth from each case a hundred times. I was already regretting making this appointment knowing that I’d have to settle for some shitty style, but for some reason I stuck it out.

Finally a sales guy helped me, and then it was too late to run. From the get go, he was acting all kinds of creepy and abrasive towards me. His opening line was “have you gotten a prescription recently because if you did I don’t want to waste my time.” I said no, it’s been a while. He didn’t believe me (because I often lie about my optical exams) so he checked the computer anyway, and of course I was right. He gave me all the forms to fill out and I didn’t check mark any of the “what diseases does your family have?” because I honestly didn’t know and for the most part we’re a healthy bunch. Again, he didn’t believe me so he interrogated me and insisted on going over every single question again to confirm my answer. Once he was convinced that I wasn’t trying to pull a fast one on him, hiding a family history of asthma, he moved on. But not to the preliminary eye tests like he should have.

Instead, he asked me if I was Filipino, and then spouted off all of the tagalog words for genitals that he could think of. He obviously knew what they meant, but wanted me to translate anyway because he is a sick fuck who would get off on me saying the words penis and vagina. He then said “sip sip ti ti mo” (loosely means “suck your dick”), and asked me to translate again. I refused again. He gathered copies of the paperwork I filled out and handed them to me, then said some strange comment like “I like to put those near my toilet so I can read them while I go to the bathroom.” I made a face at him, then he laughed at me and smacked me on the back- rather hard- like we were old mates. At that point I was too shocked to react properly and just wanted to finish the damn eye exam so I could get the hell out of there.

Finally, he fitted me with an eye patch and had me rest my chin on a jaw support to do that periphery test. You know, the one where you focus one eyeball on a dot and then press a button anytime you see any movement? Instead of letting me concentrate on my test in peace, he insisted on making conversation and socializing, expecting me to respond to his asinine questions while my jaw was held shut. The line of questioning was all personal stuff– am I married, do I have a boyfriend, do I live alone, do my parents help me pay my rent, do I make a lot of money… umm yeah. Clearly appropriate conversation with a customer that you just met 20 minutes ago.

After the tests were done I sat around some more while he basically just stared at me, waiting for the test results to print out. He then leaned in real close, clearly entering my personal space, and asked me if I wanted any special discounts, all dodgy-like. I asked him to clarify, and he thought it over for a moment, possibly debating internally whether or not to ask me to blow him under the eyeball air poof machine for a free polycarbonate lens upgrade. I might not be too far off because he ultimately decided against offering it, saying “Nahhh I’m too scared… I might get caught.” I didn’t bother to ask what he meant. At last, it was time to see the REAL eye doctor. An eye doctor who apparently hates his life because he was the most miserable man I had ever met. While I was reading off letters projected onto the wall, another employee came in to get some things out of a cabinet, and was completely blocking my view. It was a good 30 seconds before the doctor even said anything to the employee. Strange, strange, strange.

The exam was all done and it was time to dilate my pupils. He dropped the solution in my eyes causing my retinas to burn like a mother bitch. I was supposed to see the doctor again after paying for my glasses and all that, but that never happened, so I was finally cleared to leave. I had tossed my contacts and didn’t have my eyeglasses on me, so walking out into the dark parking lot was quite difficult. First off, I couldn’t even find my car. Then I realized I had exited the opposite side of the building. Even in the correct lot, it was still impossible to find my car. Once I found it, I had the daunting task of actually driving home… in the dark… in traffic… with my eyes burning and blurry… barely even able to keep them open. Thank god I only lived a couple miles from the place. Definitely never doing that again.

That was Monday, it is now Thursday, and I still haven’t gone back to see the doc again or even pick up my “ready in an hour” eyeglasses. I am putting it off for as long as I possibly can; that’s how bad I DON’T want to go back. I wish they could just pop them in the mail. I just really don’t want to see that dude again. Maybe I’ll go Saturday morning and hope he’s not working. All I know is I am never, ever going back to that place again for my future optical needs.

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August 16, 2009 update: I never did go back to get my glasses. They also never bothered to call to see if I was still alive.

Clear Cut

If you saw down new ideas

To better view the known

A stumpy, vacant prairie

Is all that you will own

My Least Favorite People

Today's honorary title will have to be split among two people, whom I will not name, the better to deny them any publicity.

1. The numbskull who showed up to President Obama's town hall meeting in NH wearing a gun, and carrying a sign referring to Jefferson's famous quote:"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants." What do you suppose his message meant? To top it off, he was standing on the property of a church across the street from where the meeting was held, which gave him permission to do so. I wonder what type of church endorses such behavior. I was reminded of the Southern churches that used to harbor, extoll, and exhort the members of the KKK when they set about to "protesting" the civil rights movement. Of course, he got his wish and received numerous television interviews, where at no time would he explain the need for the gun, nor the exact nature of his gripe.

2. The idiot doctor who, in an online debate over health reform, weighed in with the idea that health care was not a right. He was representing a coalition of doctors against health reform. This is of course a lot like a group of trial lawyers opposing tort reform. But really, a doctor thinks health care isn't a right? We are a nation that requires our children to receive an education, but a more basic need is not a right, but rather a privilege. Ironic and sad that most people who seem to be opposing health care reform also didn't seem to think much of education either.

By the numbers

So here are some basic numbers:

Roughly 80% of Americans have some sort of health insurance.

Of those, approximately 73% like their coverage.

This means that 58% of Americans like their health care coverage.

Of course, of that 58%, how many would feel that way if they got a really bad illness and got kicked off their coverage, as has become a common practice these days among the insurance companies?

Setting all that aside, there hasn't been a protester at one of the town halls yet who has claimed to be uninsured. Could much of this simply be a case of those in the boat being unwilling to pay for those in the water to have a chance to be in the boat? Sounds a bit like immigration, doesn't it?

Economics 666

There are two types of fiscal conservative: The tiny minority of individuals who, through privileged accident of birth and a surfeit of that most basic of human flaws, pure selfish greed, actually personally benefit from unfettered, rapacious, deregulated Darwinism; and the rest who, despite suffering at the hands of the first group, romanticize the idea that they too could be a “master of the universe”, primarily because like sheep, they’ve been cleverly sold this concept co-mingled with some combination of their deeply-held social bigotries. It is the staggering effectiveness of such selling-the-disease-to-the-afflicted that causes me to acknowledge the genius of Ronald Reagan, or at least that of his political handlers. It is fairly easy to sell the idea of a cure to the sick, but to convince them that their salvation lies in more people contracting their dread illness? That’s impressive, and more than a little heartbreaking.

Beginning Anew

I don't know about everyone else, but I got busy, then I somehow got locked out of the blog. It would seem there are things to be said, and I have solved the pesky password issue, so let the fun begin anew.